Day 20 – make a wish

This post will go up at 11:11pm (PST) on 11.11.

I have always had a thing about 11:11… it is the time that I always happen to look at the clock.  I have always thought of it as a lucky number, and have been making wishes on it for as long as I can remember.

Looking back a lot of those wishes have come true.

I could believe it to be chance - a happy accident - or I can accept that I created my reality. I made shit happen!

Today in teacher training (Yoga Blend with Christy Marsden) we were talking about this exact issue:  it is so easy to focus on what’s ahead, to discredit the work that we have already done... to future trip.  We look back and think about the could haves, should haves, would haves; and when things have gone right we chalk it up to circumstance rather than owning it (or maybe that's just me?).  I know I do this; I’ve talked about it on this blog. I know this is something I will continue to work on – finding the balance between doing the work/pushing ahead and finding some gratitude.

I know that those wishes came true because I believed in them, because I could see them, because I took action to make them happen, because I have worked really fucking hard through some really tough stuff.  It’s not about bragging or inflating my ego – its about giving myself some credit.

There were times when just making a wish was tough – the head-trip of impossibility, worthlessness, guilt, etc. would get in the way of stating what it was I really wanted, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy of crappiness.  What we put out is what we get back... so tonight I hope you’ll join me in making your biggest wish, in putting your greatest dream out there.

What we feed grows – are you feeding your wishes or your nightmares?

“Wish it, believe it, and it will be so.” - Deborah Smith